Reasons why Y Chromosome is more excited than me that my birthday is almost here
- What did you get me?
- Where did you get it?
- Did you buy it in a store? If so, did it come in a paper bag or plastic? Did the bag have handles?
- Did you buy it online? If so, did it arrive yet? Where will it arrive? Did you do package tracking?
- Am I going to like it? How much? How do you know? On a scale of one to ten, how much will I like it? How can you be sure?
- How big is it?
- How much does it weigh? Does it weigh more than Louie? Louie Anderson? Louis Armstrong?
- Why won’t you tell me? Is it because you like to torture me?
- Don’t you think that because you stepped on my foot earlier, it means that I should get a hint about my present? Oh, so you don’t believe in fairness, or our fine justice system then, Commie?
- If I tossed it at you and it hit you in the head, would it hurt?