And her twin sister, Tulleula

Y Chromosome pulls a light colored strand from his shirt.
Me: Your other girlfriend’s hair, I presume?
Y Chrome: It’s not hair. I think it’s a fiber.
Me: Riiiiight. I believe you. What’s her name?
Y Chrome: Polly-Esther Rayon.
Me: A southern woman, hm? I should have known.

He was once very sweet, I swear

While we were watching t.v. last night, a commercial featuring Laura Bush came on.
Me: Oh, come on now, Laura. I can clearly see your eyes moving back and forth as you’re reading from the teleprompter.
Y Chrome: Isn’t she a literacy advocate? Isn’t that what she’s pushing—reading to your children? She’s reading!  It’s not “recite from [...]

Bonus points if you find Naked Waldo

This weekend is the harvest festival at Y Chromosome’s family farm. For me, this primarily means that I will be spending my day tomorrow moving tables, putting up signs, cutting up fruit, and drinking three times my weight in hot apple cider. All in all, a good way to spend your Saturday.
W.: My goal for [...]

Humanely avoiding a Highlights pun

I was an avid fan of Highlights Magazine and kids’ puzzle activities as a kid. The only place I had access to them before my sister got a subscription was at our dentist’s office, so we never put up a fuss when we had to go visit good old Dr. Adams. Really. The nerdiness of [...]

It nearly evens out

It’s that time of year: when the traffic gets bad again, finding seats at a restaurant is impossible, and I once more have to slalom my way down the stairs of my apartment building, weaving between used condoms, spilled beer, and puddles of half-digested Ramen noodles spiked with stomach acid.
That’s right: the students are back [...]